I got back to New York this morning and I’m so happy.
There is no where else I would rather be on New Years.
everyone else have a happy new year and try to stay out of trouble.
I don’t know if hve a happy new years means like, have a happy yer next year, or have one good drunken night and a mediocre year. but whatever it is, just have one.
ok so I am one year older than I was a few days ago. That doesn’t sound like it made much sense but it does. I am not going to tell you how old I am. I am getting to an age where I am not so proud of my age, so you will just have to politely guess.
I went out for my birthday (which is coincedentally also Christmas) with a few friends. We went to TGI Fridays, because it’s like, the only place open on Christmas. I drank an infinite amount of shots, and colorful drinks with whipped topping and strawberries and cherries and pineapples and whatever. I remember drinking, I remember dancing in the bathroom, I remember random asain girls coming to the table who I think wanted to have sex with me, or my boyfriend, or both, or neither, and of course, I remember tickle me elmo. My friend Jason (who is Belladonna’s brother- and man on man he really hates it when people call him Belladonna’s brother but if you were Belladonna’s brother, the same thing would happen to you) got me a ticke me elmo doll for my birthday. I am in love with it. It’s so creepy and cute and scary at the same time.
Apparently I came home and started spelling out male porn star names and tried to figure out whose was longer. I came to the very exciting conclusion that "Brian Surewood" is in fact a longer name than "James Deen" and felt the need to announce this to a room full of people. It’s facinating, isn’t it?
i feel awful.
because everyone i know, or have ever known in my life calls me, texts me, or emails me on my birthday… and I rarely remember to call anyone on their birthdays.
either I am a really awful friend, or it’s just extremely convenient that my birthday is on the same day as Jesus’… and since people cant call Jesus really, they call me.
Is that a legitamate excuse?
I don’t know.
happy birthday to me.
i woke up late, and ate lots of un-kosher food. well… not a lot of types of unkosher food, just a lot of one thing that is really un-kosher… and that’s bacon. I ate like, 10 pieces of bacon. it’s weird. my mom knows that I do pon but she doesn’t know that I eat bacon. I don’t even eat it that often, only on days off… which are very few and far between.
i have a new respect for Justin Timberlake after seeing that "dick in the box" song. Do you know what I’m talking about? It’s the song he did on Saturday Night Live. It’s so funny. I always wanted to have sex with him. I didn’t have much respect for him, but I did want to fuck him. Now I don’t think I really think I want to fuck him anymore, but I’d like to hang out with him…. and maybe me and him could make a dick in the box video of our own one day. that would rule. (unfortunately, they took all the "dick in a box" videos off You Tube so i can’t link you to it to watch it if you haven’t seen it before.)
that porn video with screech in it really sucks. it’s the most staged sex tape i’ve ever seen, and it’s really not hot. I always liked screech, and I always pushed for him and Lisa to do it one day in the old Saved By The Bell episodes. Now I think he’s a retard, and I’m glad he was a dork in the fake high-school that he went to.
that’s all i have to say for now.
It’s my newewst masterpiece!